The University of Ottawa recently performed a study of 23 undergraduates (seems like a small sample, eh? Canadian joke!) to see what they thought about the various types of casual relationships that are gaining popularity in today’s society. They categorized the types of relationships as friends with benefits, booty calls, one-night stands, and f***-buddies, and then asked the students what their opinions were on each of the types of relationships.

They found that while all the relationships would be considered “casual,” they all have different unspoken rules (not unlike our Booty Call Commandments) the relationship doesn’t lose control and plummet into the ground at 300 miles an hour.

Via the Ottawa Citizen, here are the rules for each of the relationships:

One-night stand

• The partners are not already friends or acquainted. Alcohol is not necessarily involved.

• There is no discussion of what each partner wants out of the relationship.

• Staying overnight is acceptable but that’s it. (“You wake up and leave. You don’t stay and have coffee and breakfast or anything like that,” said one participant.)

• Typically, there is no further contact and no need to terminate the relationship, although on occasion these develop into committed relationships. If the partners meet again for sex, the relationship is considered a booty call.

Booty call

• The partners know each other and at least one has the other’s phone number, but they are not friends.

• Alcohol is commonly involved.

• Monogamy is not discussed or expected.

• A cellphone is the cost common form of contact, usually a text message, which minimizes fear of rejection. The purpose of the visit may not be explicitly stated. The initiator may call if he (it’s usually a he) is too drunk to compose a text message. The recipient, who is known as the “booty call,” must respond in the affirmative.

• There are few or no emotionally intimate acts such as hand-holding or kissing.

• There is no need to terminate the relationship. It’s over when one or the other partner decides not to call, or to ignore a call.

• It is acceptable to call from a bar, or leave after a booty call and socialize with friends.

• Booty calls are not necessarily added as Facebook friends because they are not friends.

F*** buddy

• A long-term booty call may evolve into a F*** buddy relationship, and this may develop into a friendship. (“I think a booty call is once in a while. If it’s more often than that, say a couple of times a week or more than that, then I think you would call it a f*** buddy,” said one participant.)

• A f*** buddy is more likely to be added as a friend on Facebook than a booty call. Partners will agree as to what information may be publicly shared with a wider audience.

• A f*** buddy is considered a closer relationship than a booty call. The partners may engage in social activities such as going to a movie.

• There is no need for a formal termination of the relationship. If there is a friendship, it is likely to lapse.

• As the partners meet more than once for sex, the possibility of a dating relationship (hand-holding, romance, dinner) decreases.

Friends with benefits

• Partners had a pre-existing friendship before the sexual relationship.

• The parameters of the relationship are discussed before sex is initiated. Although there is an expectation that the relationship won’t become romantic, it is understood that this possibility may create problems.

• Friends with benefits are not necessarily monogamous, but they must inform the other partner if they get involved with someone else.

• Alcohol may be involved in the initiation of the sexual relationship.

• Discretion is expected. The partners may terminate their sexual relationship if mutual friends find out about it because the relationship may endanger the group dynamic.

• The partners can socialize with each other without any intention to have sex.

Seems like a pretty solid analysis of the various types of relationships to us! And the interesting part is how students believe that the relationships can evolve, like say a one-night stand could become a full-fledged monogamous relationship, and a booty call could become a f***-buddy.

Of course, there are always exceptions to the rules, like say when a booty call ends up becoming a relationship (as happens nearly every week according to our testiMOANials), but we’d say the Ottawa Citizen, and the students of U of O have formed a pretty standard set of rules for each of the types of relationships. We’re printing these out and putting them on index cards for future reference. You should too.

Image via Glamour

SPEAKING OF PENISES AND THINGS THAT MAKE THEM HAPPY, here is great news from GQ magazine: Mila Kunis, your favorite actress, cartoon voice, and smokin’ hot Russian-speaking bombshell has been named the men’s mag’s number one knockout of the year, and we COULDN’T AGREE MORE.

But just when you thought the Black Swan star couldn’t become MORE of your dream booty call (especially after her turn in the ultimate booty call movie Friends With Benefits), you read this story from her GQ interview, wherein her interviewer shows up sick and she takes VERY good care of him:

She hands me a Grgich Hills Cabernet Franc (retail $50) to open, then sniffs the bottle and declares it “perfect for boiling.” Into the saucepan it goes, followed by an avalanche of green-tea powder (“It’s vitamins!”), two gelcaps of fish oil (“What’s the difference? It’s all going to end up liquefied and syrupy”), apple-cider vinegar (“‘Cause that’s just always good for you”), and Ayurvedic chai. “See,” she says, “at least I didn’t give you the women’s bone vitamin.” The result is a kind of glogg from hell. For a moment, we both admire the roiling potion. The melted gelcaps have coated the saucepan’s bottom, while the released fish oil blots the surface. [Then] Kunis upends half a bottle of Ketel One into the mix. “There. Healthy! This will kill everything.”

Are you in love yet? I’M IN LOVE.

Check out this month’s GQ for more heart-pounding photos of the hottest thing to come out of the Ukraine since, um… anything?

Although it would all be solved if the guy just had a reliable booty call! ;)

Via Buzzfeed

via modernmom

I don’t know if it’s the warmer weather (it’s 90 degrees in San Diego), the celebration of Osama’s death getting people riled up (gross), or the Royal Wedding, but people have been talkin’ sex this week. Not only are Australian dudes having “too much” sex, but fat people are “unsatisfied,” and now single parents might be more DTF!?

According to Jezebel, that is the case – based on a Match.com survey,

21% of single parents are currently dating someone versus 16% of singles without kids; 35% of single parents have been on a first date in the past year versus 27% of singles without kids.

Of course, as the author points out, we can’t be sure exactly of what “dating” means. It could mean anything from “have been on one date” to “are in an exclusive relationship,” although that’s probably not the case considering they’re still on Match.com.

So comes the all-important question – would you date a single mom or dad? Considering that question is often prominently featured in online dating questionnaires, it must be an important topic for people. Before you consider a relationship with a single parent, though, you should probably consider a couple factors:

1.What type of relationship you are looking for

There is a reason there is MILF porn. A lot of guys think the idea of having a booty call or Friends With Benefits relationship with a more experienced woman would be awesome. However, many single mothers who are in the dating scene aren’t looking for a casual relationship. Be sure to get your intentions on the table early.

2. Whether or not they have sole custody

Even if you are both looking for just a hook up relationship, you should take into account whether or not your dates kid will be around every time you see each other. If that’s the case, you might want to reconsider the complications that you might cause between someone and their child if you are around a lot but don’t want to have a relationship with them.

3. How their relationship is with their kid

You can tell a lot about a person based on their relationship with their child. Are they close? Do they make an effort to see their kid often? And if not, are they providing financially and/or taking the time to build a relationship with them? Of course there are always exceptions, where the other parent makes things difficult or the child lives far away, but you might not want to get caught up with someone who is a deadbeat mom or dad.

4. PROTECTION

Remember, the reason someone is a single parent is because the relationship that conceived the child wasn’t meant to be. And although the kid is probably loved and taken care of, you need to make sure you think of yourself first! Always have protection and USE IT. We’re all grown ups here, it’s not a sixth grade awkward sex ed class anymore. Just DO IT!

What do you think? Would you date and/or hook up with a single parent? Or are people with kids off limits?

When we hear criticism about OBC, it’s usually people saying things like “you’re selling a bunch of meaningless one night stands,” and it’s then when we just roll our eyes and don’t put up a fight, because anyone who would say that obviously just doesn’t get it. If we were selling one-night stands, wouldn’t we be called OnlineOneNightStand, instead of OnlineBootyCall? Well, obviously the message isn’t as clear as we thought it was because the “one-night stand” argument continues to pop up, so let us help remind you of the differences between a booty call and a one night stand.

First of all, even science has shown that booty calls and one night stands aren’t the same!

Studies have shown that a booty call falls in a different place on the spectrum than either a one night stand or a committed relationship. They’ve also found that people who partake in casual sex are no less likely to end up in a healthy, committed relationship sometime in the future. Sometimes, booty calls even end up as relationships! And what luck,  considering sex is one of the most key elements of a relationship. No one loses in a booty call situation, it’s just two people who enjoy being single but like the benefit of having regular sex without the added drama. Instead of being single and lamenting about a “dry spell,” you can have all the perks of being single minus the tedious hunt for hook ups. What’s not to love?

Remember, safety first!

If you do it right, a booty call can be one of the safest sexual relationships a person could have! You always know to have protection ready, and can feel comfortable discussing your sexual health with a person because HEY, that might be all you have in common! With a one-night stand, you could potentially risk drunkenly thrusting your way into a hearty dose of genital herpes, AKA the gift that keeps on giving.

What’s wrong with Friends With Benefits?

Booty calls are just another way to name “friends with benefits.” Take Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake in their movie of the same name – the trailer shows that they are great friends who have bad luck in relationships, so they decide to try a fun, non-exclusive sexual relationship. A booty call is just that – a friend you can always call up for a romp in the hay without feeling guilty or awkward! Even if you aren’t “besties,” though, a booty call isn’t a stranger. You know their name. You probably know where they live. You definitely know their favorite position. You know a lot more about a booty call then you know about a one-night stand, even if you think you “fell in love” at the bar. Although you might not watch movies and eat take out together, you can get to know a lot about your booty call, without ever having to deal with an emotional commitment that will almost certainly end in heartbreak.

On top of these three MASSIVE differences, there also lies the fact that you can meet a booty call on OnlineBootyCall.com. Sure, we bet there have been a few one night stands in our time becoming the #1 casual dating site on the internet, but that is not our intention. At OnlineBootyCall, you can meet someone, learn stuff about them, chat with them online, and even get a little dirty before you even meet… all while knowing that you’re both only looking for a great time and nothing serious, or in other words, a booty call!

This is one of those music videos where, despite complaining the entire time, I watched through to the very end. It’s by “The Midnight Beast,” who I both A) have never heard of and B) am somewhat creeped out by, but something about the ADD-like cut scenes and barely-legal teens in this made me sit through until the very last second, right before I stated, “that’s the worst thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life.”

However, it’s a pretty hilarious song, and even though many of the British references went a little over my head, I have to admit these three little dorks kinda grew on me.

Check out the video below and let us know what you think? Awful, or awesome?

But can we agree that this is a pretty hilarious story? That if you opened up a big, foul-smelling bag of those chalky tasting candy hearts and the first one you pulled out said NICE T*TS, you’d probably laugh your ass off and immediately show everyone you knew? We all agree on that, right?

Let’s be honest, those little candy hearts are everything that’s wrong with Valentine’s Day – no, holidays in GENERAL, these days. Crappy flavor, low quality, no purpose other than to conform to the traditions of Valentine’s Days past and make money for the corporate bigwigs to pay for their hookers.

I propose we come out with a full line of dirty candy hearts, ones that you might, say, give to a favorite booty call along with this card. That way this year you can buy little chalky hearts that at least say what you mean. No more of this, “TRUE LOVE” BS, and a whole lot more of “WANNA F***”.

Or, you know, something like that.

Twitter is ablaze today with news that someone unearthed an interesting new aspect of Wikileaks’ founder Julian Assange’s past life. The Australian, who is currently in prison with no chance of bail for “sexual assault” (air quoting real hard over here) apparently had an online dating adventure about three to four years back on the popular dating site OKCupid. Photos, profile quotes, and quiz results are showing up all over the interwebz, and judging by some of what we saw, Mr. Assange REALLY should have joined OBC instead (in fact most of the headlines are “Assange’s online booty call” which we totally take offense to because it’s not an online booty call unless you get it from the OG OBC, OBVIOUSLY).

Our favorite quote from the controversial figure’s profile? “Passionate, and often pig headed activist intellectual seeks siren for love affair, children and occasional criminal conspiracy.”

I had to look up pig-headed because what? Apparently it means stubborn, contrary, perverse, and obstinate, so he’s a stubborn, smart, passionate dude looking for a fling, which is totally awesome and fitting with the OBC doctrine minus the children part ’cause YIKES. As you can see from the photo above, Assange isn’t a bad-looking guy, but we take offense to the photos below because a) you’re not about to rob a 7-11, and b) you’re not a twelve year old girl on MySpace.

Needless to say, with a few new photos (and probably a new haircut, Doc Brown), we think Mr. Assange would make a great addition to the OnlineBootyCall dating realm. He pushes the limits and isn’t afraid to break a few rules and sounds like he’s up for an risque OBC adventure. Now if only we could find a way to break him out of Wandsworth pris

BREAKING NEWS: BCU GIRL WAS JUST ARRESTED FOR CRIMES AGAINST THE STATE AND ALSO DOG FIGHTING AND ALSO… STEALING. YEP. STEALING. NO BAIL.

“I never have really given it a shot to be single,” she says, adding, “I’d be down for some hookups.”

I know you guys are already booking flights to JFK, but slow down a bit. She’ll be filming there for months and you’ve got to get in shape, find a job, an apartment, and also somehow worm your way into her inner circle before you take the plunge. Plus, this is a big moment. Before committing to trying to bang Kim Kardashian, you need to take a hard look at your priorities and

JUST KIDDING EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF GO GO GO!

img @ gettyimages

It’s a big day for Team OBC over here: it’s Taco Tuesday, I received my monthly Cheese Aficionado magazine, and OH YEAH GUESS WHAT, OnlineBootyCall.com reached 5 MILLION MEMBERS! Can you believe it? To put that in perspective, if we were a city, we’d have a bigger population than that of Los Angeles and San Francisco combined! And if we were a country, we’d be somewhere in between Turkmenistan and Singapore! And if we were an awesome OBC party island, we’d be as big as Sicily, which is party of Italy, so… free pizza for everyone!

Okay, not really about the pizza thing, but HEY! We’re very proud to announce this big milestone, as well as another exciting one: we’ve officially trademarked the term “Booty Call”! Being the number one casual dating site in the world, we believe we’ve earned it, but of course we couldn’t do it without you, our awesome, loyal members. So a huge thank you to all of you, and we hope we’ve made you proud!

Read the whole press release about these exciting milestones at BusinessWire!